


Dwarrow-Rider

by hufflepuff_true



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Humor, M/M, Short One Shot, Tags to be added, sly dragon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-10
Updated: 2014-02-10
Packaged: 2018-01-11 20:42:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1177699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hufflepuff_true/pseuds/hufflepuff_true
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What if Smaug, Chiefest and Greatest Calamity of the Age, inadvertently outed Bilbo and Thorin's relationship to the rest of the company? </p>
<p>“Do the others know that you’re bedding the King Under the Mountain, little thief?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dwarrow-Rider

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this post on Tumblr: http://idrials.tumblr.com/post/76054037159/imagine-bilbo-introducing-himself-as-barrel-rider 
> 
> The second I read it, this popped out.

“I am Ringwinner and Luckwearer and Barrel-rider-”

“ _Dwarrow-rider_?” Smaug’s voice hissed with amusement through the air. Bilbo slipped down the pile of gold his feet rested on in his shock.

“No! No, _Barrel_ -rider! _Barrel-Rider_!” His hands went straight to his hips as he tried to correct the dragon, forgetting for a moment that the great beast would kill him should he be found.

The drake moved closer, zeroing in on the disturbance in the gold as Bilbo stamped his feet. The hobbit froze as the dragon’s maw came too close for comfort.

Smaug inhaled deeply, the force hard enough to pull at Bilbo’s clothes. “Oh, I’m certain. Barrel-rider you may be, but that isn’t all.”

The deep chuckle boomed through the chambers, bouncing off the walls and down the corridors. “So which one is it, hmm? Which one tempts the little thief?”   
  
Bilbo was speechless. How does one answer when a dragon asks whose bed roll one slips into at night?

At the sounds of his splutters, Smaug smirked. This thief was, for the moment, quite amusing. He took another deep breath. Underneath the powerful stench of sex and dwarf, the dragon recognized another scent. Oh ho, this _was_ amusing.

“Do the others know that you’re bedding the King Under the Mountain, little thief?”

And at that moment, the company burst from the tunnel.


End file.
